07-19-2009, 05:39 PM | #1 |
The Krazzy bytch
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How do drivers drive in your state????
I wrote this out a couple years ago (looks to be back in early to mid 05) & went looking for it again today for another site lol.
This is how MOST Seattle drivers drive. *This is NOT a fib its 100% true. City Morning communte: Coffee in Right hand, Food in left hand, Cellphone pressed between ear & Shoulder (it dont matter which). Right Elbow messing with sound system or something on that side of car (note: they are not droping a drop of their coffee while doing this) Left elbow Holding up a notebook, pen in mouth writing things down. (Note: they also apply makeup or shave with this elbow) Sometimes you see a toothbrush attached to steering wheel & the driver using it to brush teeth . Evening communte: Coffee in Right hand, food in left hand, Left middle finger sticking out the window (on a nice day) Doing what it does best, Cellphone pressed between ear & shoulder.Right elbow messing with something down on the right side of the car, Left elbow hairbrush brushing hair for hot date. Ok Weather driving Rain (you think people that live in washington state will know how to drive in the rain by now but you guest wrong!!!!!) Most drivers around here drive 10-15 Miles BELOW the speed limit * OMG its raining I am scaredddddddddddd* Sun 10-15 Miles below speed limit *OMG that thing is Bright* Snow In the ditch Ice In the ditch Now for the fun part how do we Washington people give Directions? How do you think? By Coffee shops or expresso stands. They are everywhere. Its either that or by stuff like take a right at the barn that burnt down 100yrs ago *WTF? I wasnt around a 100yrs ago* Now its a MALL!!!!!!! & of course you go looking for somesort of barn that was burnt down 100yrs ago only to find out it is now the local Mall & then you are wondering why they didnt tell you that in the first place. I am not lying here you guys. I had a job interview a couple years back at a local college & the gal told me to come in to the building by the Expresso stand with the red & white stripped billboard (ok? heck their was 10 of them) then walk down the hall & turn left at the student cafe shop Then go down the stairs & take a right after you get passed the PLU Expresso stand & the office is 10 doors down. There were like 100 coffee stands in this one flipping college & I wouldnt be suprised if there was one in each of the flipping dorms.
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Heart breaks everyday when you cant take care of your family because you are unemployed, cant give your family what you want or what they need
I am not a man I have boobies. Cars are like women, If you treat her rough shes going to complain & you will hear about it. If you treat her right she will purrrrrrrrrrrrr Current cars owned , 72 Skylark vert,86 fiero GT Sold , 87 Iroc-z (sold), 90 Vette Vert SOLD , 95 Z28, 99 Silverado K1500 Totaled, 2010 CGM Camaro 2ss/rs (had to sell & I hate it ) ,2012 Cruze LT repoed. Current current list lol 2006 Silverado 2500hd. |
07-19-2009, 06:04 PM | #2 |
Gunning for Sixth
Drives: '03 ZR2 Blazer Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Woodhaven, Michigan
Posts: 9,358
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Kalamazoo/I-94/KBTL
City/94 Morning Commute: "It's too damn early for this sh- HEY WAKE UP ASSHOLE! YOU. ARE. DRIVING!!" *irony..cause this is everyone* Day/Noon: "Eff it, I'm going 105. I don't see Mich. SHP.." Evening commute: See above.. Trucks: "Is he sleeping..?" or "Oh look, he has Ontario plates.. look bud, I know you have an MPH spedo on that thing too.. Just go 60 and we'll be kosher, m'kay?" Rain: "Eff it, I'm going 90." Snow: "Eff it, I'm going 75" Ice: "Eff it, I'm going 70. DITCH HOOO~" Yeah, Michigan drivers are crazy.. good drivers, but crazy. |
07-20-2009, 04:50 AM | #3 |
AwesomeBillDawesonville
Drives: CGM 2SS/RS =) Join Date: May 2009
Location: Jersey Shore
Posts: 2,067
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NJ drivers = crap, usually.
On the highways is different than the rest of the roads. Also, NJ has 2 partitions that act differently than each other.
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Order placed on 1/13/11 - Purchased 2/22/11 2SS/RS CGM |
07-20-2009, 05:38 AM | #4 | |
Banned
Drives: 1991 New Yorker, 69 Tbird, ABM2SSRS Join Date: May 2009
Location: BC Canada
Posts: 2,248
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Quote:
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07-20-2009, 05:48 AM | #5 |
Drives: Z28 Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 533
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They drive like they are from NJ.
http://usnews.rankingsandreviews.com...-U-S-Live-in-/ Oh wait.... This is Florida, most of em are from up north.
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07-20-2009, 08:19 AM | #6 |
Drives: 2010 2SS/RS M6 Black/Black Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 1,281
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Pittsburgh...
Morning commute.... School buses and the people who drive them ALWAYS drive 5-10 mph under the speed limit... and lucky me I get to pass a school bus garage about half way to work, YAY! Construction traffic.... Now I drive approximately 2.5 miles to work, 10 minute drive tops but I sit in traffic for 10+ minutes during the morning commute because people do not know how to move when the "overpaid sign guy" turns his paddle to "slow" apparently that means, leave 15 car lengths between you and the guy in front of you just incase he stops suddenly and you're arthritis inhibits you from pressing the brake pedal in time. Lunch commute.... more of the same (I avoid the menacing construction area that ruins my morning/evening commute). By this time all of the degenerates who drive H2's and EXT's on 24's that we all likely paid for are awake and stopped in the middle of the f'ing road to bs with someone also WALKING in the f'ing road (sidewalks people, use them and I might not run you over). Evening Commute... all of the bus drivers are returning their yellow diesel burning turds back to the lot (apparently they wait until I leave work to herd em' all back). More of the construction traffic from the morning, only now there is a police officer on either end pretending to conduct traffic (unless its raining, over 75 degrees or it's easier to do his job sitting in his patrol car eating a cheesesteak). Now traffic is at least 3x as thick as the morning commute so it takes an additional 35-40 minutes to get home (that's right 45 minutes to go 2.5 miles, and now we know why I average 12mpg). Other traffic phenomenon: Tunnels... people immediately go from 65 to 10 when entering a tunnel, and if your lucky it's a bright sunny day and by the time your eyes adjust to the under-lit tunnel you can pick aforementioned driver's taillights from your teeth. Potholes... they are everywhere, always have been and always will be, avoid them carefully, if that means coming into MY lane to do so, apparently you have the wrong definition of carefully. Street width... where I live the community is set on a grid, the streets are wide enough to have cars parked on both sides and you can drive a semi either way with 4 feet to the left, 4 to the right and 4 in between them, not $#itting you. I never knew that a 1997 Chrysler LHS could transform itself to be 16' wide, leaving me approximately 0" to squeeze my car between them and the parked cars along the side of the road (and if someone is walking IN THE F'ING STREET, forget it. Parking spaces... seriously, just start painting the damn things crooked, maybe at least half of the people will get it right Parallel parking.... HA!, 17 minutes later, three smashed license plate frames, multiple bumper scrapes, curb rash, a bent parking meeter and dead cat later... 3/4 of your car is still in the f'ing street. The "tight squeeze"... kind of goes with "street width" from above... Threading the needle maybe?? I've seen my 87 year old grandmother do this hundreds of times, it can't be that hard right? A spot that I could tow a mobile home pulling a 747 behind it through... doesn't fit your Honda civic... amazing. Gas stations... for the love of God, please start putting filler necks on the same side of every car... people obviously aren't intelligent enough or considerate enough to figure out, if you have to pull in and block BOTH pumps, you're probably not doing something right. Oh and if you're going in the store to buy a blunt and every three digit number lottery ticket, boxed.. don't park at the f'ing pump!! Drive thru's... now that you've ordered 37 happy meals for the baseball team, 6 milkshakes for yourself and a 10 piece nugget meal (they are delicious)... can you let me out of line so I can go somewhere that has food left? Stop - except right turn sign... Read much? Right on red except between 7am - 7pm.... here's a watch, and a knife so you can stab yourself in the face The light JUST turned green... if you honk at me the second the light changes, be prepared to travel the rest of the way home at 5mph. I didn't know I was supposed to pull a .003 light, I would have launched at 2500 instead of 800... sheesh.. Stopping for a red light... pretty simple stuff huh? When I drive I drive in front of the car in front of me, like looking ahead of them to see what kind of $hit they are about to get into. When you stop, like STOP stop, 100 yards from the cars stopped at the light... it causes EVERYONE behind you to slam on their brakes, and if I'm lucky the guy behind me got his 1978 International Dump inspected and his brakes work (as good as they could I guess). Hit and run... Nothing better than owning a brand new car and having someone hit it while parked and being so kind as to not leave any evidence, including their information. Thanks @$$hole, I enjoyed my brand new car for 3 months... now it's forever tarnished. Letting your fully loaded shopping cart roam the parking lot (just witnessed this yesterday)... if you're loading your groceries, dog food or stack of bricks and your cart goes exploring, bounces off of a nice shiny truck and comes to rest a few inches from the tailgate it just caved in and you say "wow look how close it stopped, it didn't even hit"... um yes it did, I just watched it bounce off of the tailgate and that taillight it just cracked... Cell phone drivers at 5:40am... who the hell are you possibly talking to that early? Riding the brake... if you'd like to piss me off, please get in front of me and hold your brake while you take off from a stop sign or proceed up a hill ok I'm done, could keep going but I'll stop Last edited by Scrapppy666; 07-20-2009 at 08:35 AM. |
07-20-2009, 08:35 AM | #7 |
OH CANADA!
Drives: 2011 RAM 1500 LARAMIE Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Edmonton, AB, CAN
Posts: 3,930
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Had to trade in the Camaro for a truck :(, but hopefully I can join the Camaro family again one day |
07-20-2009, 09:09 AM | #8 |
Gunning for Sixth
Drives: '03 ZR2 Blazer Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Woodhaven, Michigan
Posts: 9,358
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07-20-2009, 09:26 AM | #9 |
Drives: 2010 2SS/RS M6 Black/Black Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 1,281
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Np, you needed it just as much as I needed to let it out.. obviously
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07-20-2009, 09:26 AM | #10 |
Drives: . Join Date: May 2008
Location: .
Posts: 3,053
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07-20-2009, 09:38 AM | #11 |
Drives: 2010 2SS/RS M6 Black/Black Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 1,281
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07-20-2009, 09:49 AM | #12 |
NCM-WINR
Drives: 2010 SS/RS IOM 2014 2LT Stingray Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 2,324
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Scrapppy666, You left out that when the light changes to green the guy across from you feels it is his God given right to make his left turn in front of you. My BIGGEST PET PEAV of Pittsburgh drivers is their inability to merge onto a highway. They will fly down the ramp and when they get to the yield sign they stop. Then they have to wait until there is a big enough gap in traffic to go from 0 to speed of traffic. Of course if your behind them you are now in the same boat. Please Pittsburghers. Just get up to speed, check traffic and then either speed up or slow down to merge with little to no hassle or danger. When I'm on the highway I will slow down or move over to let people merge in. Not here. If I slow down they slow down. As an experiment I have come to a complete stop on the highway to see if they were capable of merging. (no traffic behind me of course) I've done this 3 times and each time the person merging on also came to a stop and couldn't figure out what to do. People make fun of Cleveland and West Virginia. Pittsburgh is in between and has the worst of both worlds inbred together.
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also drives a heavily modified Jeep Wrangler. It has LED headlights and wheel weights blacked out with Plasti Dip. It's Baller.
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07-20-2009, 09:54 AM | #13 |
Drives: 2010 2SS/RS M6 Black/Black Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 1,281
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^^^ ahh good call BUT I must say... have to put a little blame on good old Pen-dot and their blind on-ramps
I also can't stand the left turn on green, I'm not sure where you're from but the Waterfront is good for this, lots of 4-way stops and likely the highest concentration of morons in the area |
07-21-2009, 10:44 AM | #14 |
NCM-WINR
Drives: 2010 SS/RS IOM 2014 2LT Stingray Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 2,324
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North Hills but I have been to the waterfront many times. I know of what you speak.
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also drives a heavily modified Jeep Wrangler. It has LED headlights and wheel weights blacked out with Plasti Dip. It's Baller.
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