Am I too young to teach my brother the value of a dollar?

[ZeeTwentyFour]

WARNING drama ahead.

Here is the story. I am 18, my brother is 13. The other day his xbox 360 broke for some reason or another. While his is being sent back to microsoft to be fixed I am letting him borrow my xbox 360. But he has to give me some sort of collateral, his playstation 3.

Normally I wouldn't do that, but he has had a hard time learning how to appreciate things and how take car of what he has. So more often then not his things get broken. He has gone through a half dozen xbox 360 controllers because of how he loses his temper and smacks them on the table, his xbox has gotten the "red ring" at least twice (I cant really blame his for that because I don't know why that happens, but I attribute it to him playing it to much and it over heating) Dont even ask how many xbox live headsets he has gone through. My parents just cave in and buy him new controllers and go out of their way to get the xbox fixed. And when he does poorly in school and they say "no more video games until we see an improvement" that lasts all of 1, maybe 2 days before they cave in.

So what is he learning?

I love my parents, I couldn't ask for better ones, they do so much for me, pay my tuition, car insurance, and let me live in their home for free. I hate to go against them but I disagree with them on how they are just giving in to my brother.

So tonight when they heard that I sold my brother grand theft auto 4 for $14 they flipped, or at least my dad did. I told him I was going to sell it to the gamestop either way so I let him get it before the store did. He seems to think I should have just given it to him because he is my brother and family doesn't charge each other anything, and that I am being selfish for taking his playstation as collateral.

Well I think that if MY xbox breaks, the one that I spent MY OWN $500 for I am owed something until it is fixed, if it is my brothers fault. He asked "Do I do that same to you when you borrow my car?" of course he doesn't, and that is his choice, he also said "For the same reason we don't charge you to live here, you shouldn't charge him for a game, he has limited income just like you do." but I think this situation is a little different. PLEASE tell me if I am wrong.

while I agree to a point, I am not my father and don't want to keep giving and giving to some one who is undeserving at the moment.

My dad said "don't try and teach anyone anything until you got it all figured out" This may be true. I ask, am I out of line for doing what I did, or tried to do?

[The_Beast_]

Nope. Your right. In my opinion just give him a good beatin. Its how I was raised and I turned out great.

[jeffny09]

nope but parents are always right =)

[zebra]

one thing i learned is that you don't appreciate the things that are handed to you anywhere near as much as the things that you work to acquire by your own means. i stand behind your reasoning.

Originally Posted by jeffny09

nope but parents are always right =)

how about 'parents are usually more right than we give them credit for'

[chadrcr]

I think you are on the right track. You may have figured it out before your dad...maybe... it sounds like they are 'giving in' to BOTH of you, but somehow you seem to have learned the 'value of a dollar', so MAYBE they are doing something right. You are NOT too young to teach him, he MIGHT be too young to learn 'value' given the fact that your parents are very generous. But, if you buy something with your money... I think you should be able to 'charge' him something for using it... especially if he tends to break your (or his) stuff. Family discounts...ok too though

[Iroczlover]

a couple weeks ago I had to go out & buy my son new shoes & new pants I told him that if I did this since we got him new shoes & pants in sept tht he will have to owe me the money back.
This next weekend is a swap meet where my kids along with a few others will be out hauling parts around for people believe me. He is more than willing to do this that way he can makemoney.

[Matrix]

Call me old fashioned but family are family and I would never charge them IF the items were small. But the grey area would be for large purchases etc where you would expect some return. Your bro needs a good whip ta day if u ask me. He seems spoilt and thats not your fault but maybe your parents could do more to bring him up to appreciate things and respect them.

On second thoughts youre just 18 and maybe you needed that money, so you prolly were right in selling it to him. Next time, go to your parents and tell them you are selling it to the pawn shop cos you needed the money. They will say, "but you could give it to your bro". You say, "But then I wont have the money I need". They will say, "heres the money" That way EVERYONE wins LOL!

[Matrix]

A couple of years ago, my son was playing around with tea candles and didnt place them in a holder, just the aluminum shell they came in and he scorched my $4000 dining room table buy leaving it to burn away on it. Well, I took away his monthy allowance. I still havnt reinstated it as I dont feel the debt is payed. Boy was I pissed about it!!

[Mr Twisty]

Honor your parents wishes, as long as it's not illegal or immoral. There's always 2 sides to these kinds of stories.
You'll be married with kids of your own before you know it, and you can raise them however you think is right.

[FenwickHockey65]

No. Absolutely not. If he doesn't learn to spend his money wisely/take care of the things he owns when he's young, then I don't even want to think about how he'll turn out when he's older.

A few years ago, my parents would buy stuff for me. But ever since I got a job and started earning my own money, I have to pay for the things I want myself. And believe me, I've learned the value of a dollar and how hard I had to work to earn some money.

By the way...

Normally I wouldn't do that, but he has had a hard time learning how to appreciate things and how take car of what he has. So more often then not his things get broken. He has gone through a half dozen xbox 360 controllers because of how he loses his temper and smacks them on the table, his xbox has gotten the "red ring" at least twice (I cant really blame his for that because I don't know why that happens, but I attribute it to him playing it to much and it over heating) Dont even ask how many xbox live headsets he has gone through. My parents just cave in and buy him new controllers and go out of their way to get the xbox fixed. And when he does poorly in school and they say "no more video games until we see an improvement" that lasts all of 1, maybe 2 days before they cave in.

^^ This right here needs to stop. If he accidentally breaks it, fine, go ahead and buy him a new one, but if he can't control his temper and starts smashing things, he needs to pay for it himself. The whole "red ring of death" thing obviously isn't his fault, and they can just send the Xbox back and get a new one, and headsets malfunction very easily. But the controller issue needs to be fixed.

[BlackXIV]

First of all being a parent I don't think you should go against your parents. However, your parents know how poorly your little brother takes care of his stuff. I don't think you were wrong in asking him to pay for the game or asking for the PS3 as collateral. Maybe you should explain to your dad why you asked for collateral but I'm sure he knows. The only way he is going to learn to take better care of his stuff is to pay for it himself. Thats where you parents need to step in and stop paying for all of his broken items. In my opinion of course.

[BigRigMike]

My only question is did you buy GTA with your own money (or given to you as a christmas or b-day gift) or did your parents buy it for you? If you bought it yourself then I would say heck yeah he has to pay for it, since that does show you know what a dollar is worth. If you parents bought it for you and then you sold it to your brother then that is not cool since it wasn't your money.

[DGthe3]

You're not too young to teach him a lesson about life, he might be just old enough to not be able to learn it though. I know I never listened to my brothers advice when I was 13.

Selling him the game is questionable, but asking for collateral for your 360 is perfectly reasonable. If you're parents don't want you to ask him for collateral, fine. Don't give your brother the 360. Or while he is getting his Xbox fixed, he could use his PS3 and thats the end of it.

[ZeeTwentyFour]

Originally Posted by Matrix

Call me old fashioned but family are family and I would never charge them IF the items were small. But the grey area would be for large purchases etc where you would expect some return. Your bro needs a good whip ta day if u ask me. He seems spoilt and thats not your fault but maybe your parents could do more to bring him up to appreciate things and respect them.

On second thoughts youre just 18 and maybe you needed that money, so you prolly were right in selling it to him. Next time, go to your parents and tell them you are selling it to the pawn shop cos you needed the money. They will say, "but you could give it to your bro". You say, "But then I wont have the money I need". They will say, "heres the money" That way EVERYONE wins LOL!

Thats exactly what my dad said, he was going to to give me the money instead of my brother. I havent decided what I'm going to do because I don't want my dads money.

Originally Posted by BigRigMike

My only question is did you buy GTA with your own money (or given to you as a christmas or b-day gift) or did your parents buy it for you? If you bought it yourself then I would say heck yeah he has to pay for it, since that does show you know what a dollar is worth. If you parents bought it for you and then you sold it to your brother then that is not cool since it wasn't your money.

I bought it the day it came out.

Originally Posted by BlackXIV

First of all being a parent I don't think you should go against your parents. However, your parents know how poorly your little brother takes care of his stuff. I don't think you were wrong in asking him to pay for the game or asking for the PS3 as collateral. Maybe you should explain to your dad why you asked for collateral but I'm sure he knows. The only way he is going to learn to take better care of his stuff is to pay for it himself. Thats where you parents need to step in and stop paying for all of his broken items. In my opinion of course.

I tried to explain to him why I asked for collateral and he looked at me like I had 3 heads. Then after I tried to explain my logic and I was trying to help my brother learn the value of a dollar, that is when he said "well I don't understand your thinking at all, and don't try to teach anyone anything until you have it all down pat" or something to that effect.