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Old 01-21-2010, 06:36 PM   #1
Dboy23
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Best Ticket Excuse.

"Your honor I was going 20 mph over the legal speed limit as a suicide attempt, the kind officer stopped me right before I was going to crash into the pole." - that's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Anyone else heard any good ones? There's one I can't remember off the top of my head but I'll post it when I do.
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Old 01-21-2010, 06:39 PM   #2
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"your girlfriend just chased me out of her house, you know how she gets. she was mad that i was coming to her after i left your mothers" i have cop friends
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Old 01-21-2010, 06:43 PM   #3
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I just got my first erection in 10 years and I was rushing home so me and my wife could enjoy it, but when I saw the blue lights I lost it..
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Old 01-21-2010, 06:57 PM   #4
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Turtle head...
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:05 PM   #5
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If I get a ticket I claim the speedometer is incorrect. The court will then mandate I have the car checked. EVERY car is off by a few klicks, so the report will come back that yes... the speedometer is incorrect, if even 1 km/h.

The fine is then changed from a speeding violation to a violation of the Highway Safety Act. No points taken off, but the fine is tripled. I don't have a problem with that. If I speed, I'll pay for it. If no points are taken off, my insurance doesn't change.

This is in Alberta, Canada, by the way. The courts realized that people were claiming "incorrect speedometer readings", and rather than close that so-called-loophole... they raised the safety violation fine to 3X that of the speeding fine.

Keep in mind, if you actually cause an accident or if someone is injured... good luck. The courts are NOT lenient in that case, and rightly so.
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:09 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Miketebo22 View Post
"your girlfriend just chased me out of her house, you know how she gets. she was mad that i was coming to her after i left your mothers" i have cop friends
That's awesome, I'd have loved to have seen the cops face.
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:11 PM   #7
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I was going 10+mph over and had my gf in the passanger seat, I had her hold her shorts tight and told the officer she just had her period and bled on my seat. He laughed and told me to get the hell out of here!
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:22 PM   #8
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explosive diarrhea
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:22 PM   #9
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how much money to let this situation vanish
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:23 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hemlawk View Post
Turtle head...


I`m going to have to try that sometime! LOL!
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:24 PM   #11
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I knew someone, who was male once told the officer "I'm pregnant"
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:25 PM   #12
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this is also a good one, "stay away pig i dont want to catch swine flu"
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:31 PM   #13
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Tell him you're late for a party and you have the pot and beer
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Old 01-21-2010, 07:55 PM   #14
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Officer--"Your doing 85 in a 60, I've been waiting all day for you to get here..."
Girl--"Officer, I got here as fast as I could..."



A DPS trooper friend told me he stopped an 18 wheeler in a small town in Texas.... apparently about 60 miles from the trucks destination...

Trooper--- "papers and log book please.......... mam, where's the fire..."

Trucker--- "It's between my legs and if your man enough to put it out, climb in, otherwise let me go cause the fire department is in ______ town just down the road......"

He warned her and she left...
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