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Old 10-19-2009, 09:17 AM   #1
Beemer
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Drives: 2010 Camaro 1LT
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Thinking about returning my Camaro

I just have way too many problems with this car. Let's start with the exterior:

1. The styling is too aggressive.

I'm a pretty passive person by nature and I don't want the personality of this car to project onto me. The front looks like a snarling animal ready to pounce. Scary.

2. The paint is too shiny.

I spent last Saturday applying ZAINO to the car and I must have done it wrong because I can't even tell what color it is anymore (Victory Red, BTW). All I can see is shine and reflection.

3. It's too sexy.

What with the curves and hips that the body features I'm starting to have feelings about this car that no Christian man should have. I haven't looked it up but I'm pretty sure it's a sin.

Now about the interior:

1. The seat fits too well.

I think Oshawans must have busted into my house while I was sleeping and measured my butt because the driver's seat feels like it was made for my body. Creepy.

2. The audio system is too loud.

I can't even have a decent conversation with my wife because the audio system is always blaring Classic Rock and we're singing at the top of our lungs. That can't be good for marital relations.

3. There's too many dials, switches, knobs, displays, read-outs, etc.

I mean, seriously, what is all that stuff? I've really only used two of the three pedals (I'll let you guess which two), the shifter and the steering wheel. The rest of that stuff is just a waste of space. What the heck is OnStar? I thought Luke blew that up at the end of Ep. 4. I mean - if I wanted to make phone calls on the road I would be driving a phone booth.

On to performance problems:

1. They gave me the wrong motor.

When I ordered the 1LT several "friends" intimated that I was a wuss for not getting the V8. The V6 is a "woman's car". (I'm sure they meant no offense...) I think the Oshawans seriously screwed up and gave me the V8 because this thing is way too fast for a V6. It practically LEAPS when I step on the gas.

2. There's no indication of excessive speed.

I'm used to a car shaking like a gypsy wagon (pots and pans clanging, dead chickens swinging) when I approach 70 mph but this thing is way too smooth. I'm just casually driving, happen to look down and, to my understandable HORROR, I'm doing 85! Smooth as air hockey. That CAN'T be good.

Finally - general overall problems:

1. The Odometer must be WAY off.

There's no way I've put that many miles on it already. Just because I drive 45 miles round trip over twisty-turny country roads to get a hamburger, it shouldn't add up THAT fast. 110 miles round trip for a Chipotle burrito shouldn't be excessive. And don't even get me going about a T-Bone steak!

2. I'm unable to keep up with my TV watching.

I don't know what I'm going to do when 24 starts up again.

3. I hate letting it out of my site.

I find myself parking 6 miles away from store entrances (after letting the wife out at the door - I'm not a caveman...) because I'm deathly afraid some crazy, loony, Charlie Manson looking nut-job will give me a door ding. I'm seriously angry if a butterfly farts on my car. I don't think my heart can take the stress.

4. People keep LOOKING at me.

I feel like I'm in a July 4th parade! I really can't stand all the attention. My smile muscles hurt and my right thumb is going to be in a cast at this rate. Who needs that?

So, as you can see, I have no choice but to return the Camaro since I can't imagine any of these problems ever being resolved.

Oh wait - CRAP! I just remembered... I sold my 60 day return policy back to the dealer for $500. Well, I guess I'll just have to live with it. Maybe it will grow on me.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:22 AM   #2
SWHCPA
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Take a deep breath and a long sip on a glass of Crown. These feelings will pass.

I was driving home from church yesterday with the spousal unit in the car. Another car pulled along side, rolled down their window and started snapping photos of Snow White. The spouse was like "they took pictures of your car!". Apparently, she didn't believe the buzz about this car until yesterday.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:22 AM   #3
2010 2-Tone


 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
I just have way too many problems with this car. Let's start with the exterior:

1. The styling is too aggressive.

I'm a pretty passive person by nature and I don't want the personality of this car to project onto me. The front looks like a snarling animal ready to pounce. Scary.

2. The paint is too shiny.

I spent last Saturday applying ZAINO to the car and I must have done it wrong because I can't even tell what color it is anymore (Victory Red, BTW). All I can see is shine and reflection.

3. It's too sexy.

What with the curves and hips that the body features I'm starting to have feelings about this car that no Christian man should have. I haven't looked it up but I'm pretty sure it's a sin.

Now about the interior:

1. The seat fits too well.

I think Oshawans must have busted into my house while I was sleeping and measured my butt because the driver's seat feels like it was made for my body. Creepy.

2. The audio system is too loud.

I can't even have a decent conversation with my wife because the audio system is always blaring Classic Rock and we're singing at the top of our lungs. That can't be good for marital relations.

3. There's too many dials, switches, knobs, displays, read-outs, etc.

I mean, seriously, what is all that stuff? I've really only used two of the three pedals (I'll let you guess which two), the shifter and the steering wheel. The rest of that stuff is just a waste of space. What the heck is OnStar? I thought Luke blew that up at the end of Ep. 4. I mean - if I wanted to make phone calls on the road I would be driving a phone booth.

On to performance problems:

1. They gave me the wrong motor.

When I ordered the 1LT several "friends" intimated that I was a wuss for not getting the V8. The V6 is a "woman's car". (I'm sure they meant no offense...) I think the Oshawans seriously screwed up and gave me the V8 because this thing is way too fast for a V6. It practically LEAPS when I step on the gas.

2. There's no indication of excessive speed.

I'm used to a car shaking like a gypsy wagon (pots and pans clanging, dead chickens swinging) when I approach 70 mph but this thing is way too smooth. I'm just casually driving, happen to look down and, to my understandable HORROR, I'm doing 85! Smooth as air hockey. That CAN'T be good.

Finally - general overall problems:

1. The Odometer must be WAY off.

There's no way I've put that many miles on it already. Just because I drive 45 miles round trip over twisty-turny country roads to get a hamburger, it shouldn't add up THAT fast. 110 miles round trip for a Chipotle burrito shouldn't be excessive. And don't even get me going about a T-Bone steak!

2. I'm unable to keep up with my TV watching.

I don't know what I'm going to do when 24 starts up again.

3. I hate letting it out of my site.

I find myself parking 6 miles away from store entrances (after letting the wife out at the door - I'm not a caveman...) because I'm deathly afraid some crazy, loony, Charlie Manson looking nut-job will give me a door ding. I'm seriously angry if a butterfly farts on my car. I don't think my heart can take the stress.

4. People keep LOOKING at me.

I feel like I'm in a July 4th parade! I really can't stand all the attention. My smile muscles hurt and my right thumb is going to be in a cast at this rate. Who needs that?

So, as you can see, I have no choice but to return the Camaro since I can't imagine any of these problems ever being resolved.

Oh wait - CRAP! I just remembered... I sold my 60 day return policy back to the dealer for $500. Well, I guess I'll just have to live with it. Maybe it will grow on me.
One of the Best post since I came onboard!!!!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:24 AM   #4
AnnaBear@SpartaChevy
 
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Cute.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:26 AM   #5
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Very cute Beemer
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:27 AM   #6
Xanthos
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I'll buy it off your hands cheap if you want.

Just saying.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:29 AM   #7
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feel the same way
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:29 AM   #8
gt2serious
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Whew!! I'm glad you're one of those...you know the folks who took the money instaed of the guarantee...I mean what in the world would I do with all of those terrible Camaro's back on my lot!!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:30 AM   #9
Scrapppy666

 
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spousal unit...

Will have to add that to my vocabulary
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:30 AM   #10
Supermans
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Return the sucka..lol..
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:32 AM   #11
Mr. Wyndham
I used to be Dragoneye...
 
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THAT'S what I like to hear!!!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:34 AM   #12
2SSRS@Gen5diy
Salt & Pepper 2014 Z/28

 
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I think you are right, But for a lot of us the 60 days was up a long time ago.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:35 AM   #13
jbsrace1
 
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LMAO
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:38 AM   #14
kjd15
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You got me!

Love it!
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November 28, 2009 - Delivered!!!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:39 AM   #15
iluvmy67camaro
 
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That was a great, very entertaining to read!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:39 AM   #16
2010 2-Tone


 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Abygale View Post
Very cute Beemer
Abygale,
I love the outfit!!!
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:41 AM   #17
bossbunny
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Wow that sounds ilke such bad qualities to have in a car... I'll take it off your hands, consider it a favor.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:42 AM   #18
SQUALO
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
I just have way too many problems with this car. Let's start with the exterior:

1. The styling is too aggressive.

I'm a pretty passive person by nature and I don't want the personality of this car to project onto me. The front looks like a snarling animal ready to pounce. Scary.

2. The paint is too shiny.

I spent last Saturday applying ZAINO to the car and I must have done it wrong because I can't even tell what color it is anymore (Victory Red, BTW). All I can see is shine and reflection.

3. It's too sexy.

What with the curves and hips that the body features I'm starting to have feelings about this car that no Christian man should have. I haven't looked it up but I'm pretty sure it's a sin.

Now about the interior:

1. The seat fits too well.

I think Oshawans must have busted into my house while I was sleeping and measured my butt because the driver's seat feels like it was made for my body. Creepy.

2. The audio system is too loud.

I can't even have a decent conversation with my wife because the audio system is always blaring Classic Rock and we're singing at the top of our lungs. That can't be good for marital relations.

3. There's too many dials, switches, knobs, displays, read-outs, etc.

I mean, seriously, what is all that stuff? I've really only used two of the three pedals (I'll let you guess which two), the shifter and the steering wheel. The rest of that stuff is just a waste of space. What the heck is OnStar? I thought Luke blew that up at the end of Ep. 4. I mean - if I wanted to make phone calls on the road I would be driving a phone booth.

On to performance problems:

1. They gave me the wrong motor.

When I ordered the 1LT several "friends" intimated that I was a wuss for not getting the V8. The V6 is a "woman's car". (I'm sure they meant no offense...) I think the Oshawans seriously screwed up and gave me the V8 because this thing is way too fast for a V6. It practically LEAPS when I step on the gas.

2. There's no indication of excessive speed.

I'm used to a car shaking like a gypsy wagon (pots and pans clanging, dead chickens swinging) when I approach 70 mph but this thing is way too smooth. I'm just casually driving, happen to look down and, to my understandable HORROR, I'm doing 85! Smooth as air hockey. That CAN'T be good.

Finally - general overall problems:

1. The Odometer must be WAY off.

There's no way I've put that many miles on it already. Just because I drive 45 miles round trip over twisty-turny country roads to get a hamburger, it shouldn't add up THAT fast. 110 miles round trip for a Chipotle burrito shouldn't be excessive. And don't even get me going about a T-Bone steak!

2. I'm unable to keep up with my TV watching.

I don't know what I'm going to do when 24 starts up again.

3. I hate letting it out of my site.

I find myself parking 6 miles away from store entrances (after letting the wife out at the door - I'm not a caveman...) because I'm deathly afraid some crazy, loony, Charlie Manson looking nut-job will give me a door ding. I'm seriously angry if a butterfly farts on my car. I don't think my heart can take the stress.

4. People keep LOOKING at me.

I feel like I'm in a July 4th parade! I really can't stand all the attention. My smile muscles hurt and my right thumb is going to be in a cast at this rate. Who needs that?

So, as you can see, I have no choice but to return the Camaro since I can't imagine any of these problems ever being resolved.

Oh wait - CRAP! I just remembered... I sold my 60 day return policy back to the dealer for $500. Well, I guess I'll just have to live with it. Maybe it will grow on me.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:43 AM   #19
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Awesome posting....
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:44 AM   #20
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good write
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:46 AM   #21
Crowley
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good write
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:48 AM   #22
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Awesome

We should start a support group.
NACOAA - North American Camaro Owner's Anonymous Association, to work through these problems in a constructive manner.

BB - I see you're down to $6,500.00 now, won't be long
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:51 AM   #23
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Made my day. Exactly how I feel on a nice day like today when I drive my car. Great read. Well done.
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:54 AM   #24
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Seriously???
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Old 10-19-2009, 09:55 AM   #25
warcopwife
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
I just have way too many problems with this car. Let's start with the exterior:

1. The styling is too aggressive.

I'm a pretty passive person by nature and I don't want the personality of this car to project onto me. The front looks like a snarling animal ready to pounce. Scary.

2. The paint is too shiny.

I spent last Saturday applying ZAINO to the car and I must have done it wrong because I can't even tell what color it is anymore (Victory Red, BTW). All I can see is shine and reflection.

3. It's too sexy.

What with the curves and hips that the body features I'm starting to have feelings about this car that no Christian man should have. I haven't looked it up but I'm pretty sure it's a sin.

Now about the interior:

1. The seat fits too well.

I think Oshawans must have busted into my house while I was sleeping and measured my butt because the driver's seat feels like it was made for my body. Creepy.

2. The audio system is too loud.

I can't even have a decent conversation with my wife because the audio system is always blaring Classic Rock and we're singing at the top of our lungs. That can't be good for marital relations.

3. There's too many dials, switches, knobs, displays, read-outs, etc.

I mean, seriously, what is all that stuff? I've really only used two of the three pedals (I'll let you guess which two), the shifter and the steering wheel. The rest of that stuff is just a waste of space. What the heck is OnStar? I thought Luke blew that up at the end of Ep. 4. I mean - if I wanted to make phone calls on the road I would be driving a phone booth.

On to performance problems:

1. They gave me the wrong motor.

When I ordered the 1LT several "friends" intimated that I was a wuss for not getting the V8. The V6 is a "woman's car". (I'm sure they meant no offense...) I think the Oshawans seriously screwed up and gave me the V8 because this thing is way too fast for a V6. It practically LEAPS when I step on the gas.

2. There's no indication of excessive speed.

I'm used to a car shaking like a gypsy wagon (pots and pans clanging, dead chickens swinging) when I approach 70 mph but this thing is way too smooth. I'm just casually driving, happen to look down and, to my understandable HORROR, I'm doing 85! Smooth as air hockey. That CAN'T be good.

Finally - general overall problems:

1. The Odometer must be WAY off.

There's no way I've put that many miles on it already. Just because I drive 45 miles round trip over twisty-turny country roads to get a hamburger, it shouldn't add up THAT fast. 110 miles round trip for a Chipotle burrito shouldn't be excessive. And don't even get me going about a T-Bone steak!

2. I'm unable to keep up with my TV watching.

I don't know what I'm going to do when 24 starts up again.

3. I hate letting it out of my site.

I find myself parking 6 miles away from store entrances (after letting the wife out at the door - I'm not a caveman...) because I'm deathly afraid some crazy, loony, Charlie Manson looking nut-job will give me a door ding. I'm seriously angry if a butterfly farts on my car. I don't think my heart can take the stress.

4. People keep LOOKING at me.

I feel like I'm in a July 4th parade! I really can't stand all the attention. My smile muscles hurt and my right thumb is going to be in a cast at this rate. Who needs that?

So, as you can see, I have no choice but to return the Camaro since I can't imagine any of these problems ever being resolved.

Oh wait - CRAP! I just remembered... I sold my 60 day return policy back to the dealer for $500. Well, I guess I'll just have to live with it. Maybe it will grow on me.
That is the funniest thing I have read in a very, very, very long time! A classic! Thanks for the morning giggles!
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