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Sorry to see that happened. Are you hurt? Sometimes neck and back injuries have a delayed effect when you're in rear end collision.
You're in a tough spot. If you were rear ended the other driver's insurance should pay for the damage. I hate to say it, but you may want to consider an attorney if you're not a fault. This is a time they can help if you don't get fair resolution through either insurance company.
In my experience there is not a good chance of getting a car with frame damage repaired to new condition including fit and finish of affected panels/parts to OEM standards. I would get different body shop opinions and keep pushing back on the insurance company. Theirs is a typical first respond, so don't cave in if you feel the damage is too great. Lastly, if they do total it, be prepared to fight them on the replacement value if it doesn't cover your loan amount. It really comes down to what works best for your situation.
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