"depression" doesn't describe this feeling - Page 7 - Camaro5 Chevy Camaro Forum / Camaro ZL1, SS and V6 Forums

Jcc08 · 07-13-2009, 08:40 PM

You didn't say both of you had the same counselor???!! Isn't that a huge conflict of interest??

The first thing you need to do is stop seeing that counselor. In fact, it might be a good idea to stop the counseling immediately. All it's doing is forcing you to relive everything over and over again, to someone (probably some uber-feminist wench) who clearly isn't on your side and certainly doesn't have your best interests in mind.

I know what you're feeling. I'm not going to tell you your feelings for the girl weren't real. You were clearly in love with her...otherwise you wouldn't have sacrificed the Camaro fund to save her life. I don't want to be one of those people that tell you "it's just hormones" because in this case it's clearly not. That's why it hurts so much when she rejects you.

When I was 19, I met my dream girl. She was Argentine-Italian, from New York, and she was gorgeous. She was the first girl that ever really took an interest in me, and I fell hard. We met at an Army ROTC summer camp in Kentucky and so it was the friendship that developed first, before the chemistry. That made the bond we had a hell of a lot stronger. A few months later, I flew to New York and we spent a very...shall we say, intense...week in her dorm.

However, long story short, she lived in New York, I lived in California. We tried to write each other and email, but then she headed off to Germany on a foreign exchange trip, fell in love with some rich German dude, got pregnant (then married), and today she's got 3 kids and still living in Europe. I was heartbroken. Even today, ten years later, I still wonder what might have been.

But then I think of my beautiful wife, whom I met in 2006. She's everything I ever wanted in a girl, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, and we're celebrating our first wedding anniversary this week. If she and the Argentine girl were standing side-by-side, and I could choose one over the other, I would choose my wife in a hearbeat!

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that as painful as things are, and as awful as you feel right now, and as much as you loved her, she was not the right woman for you. She didn't deserve you, and I think you might have realized that over time. There is nothing you could have done. If she didn't cheat on you now, she would have cheated on you later, maybe at a time when you had a hell of a lot more to lose in a divorce (assets, children, etc.) than a Camaro fund.

Trust me, you're going to find the woman of your dreams, and she is going to blow this one out of the water. You just have to be patient. This one is not coming back...and even if she did, would you really trust her again? Could you ever kiss her again and not think of that bald schmuck? Wouldn't you find that your love for her was a little less because of all this?

You need to focus on the most important person right now, YOU. Go work out, focus on your studies, touch base with the friends you had when you were single, and start living your life again. As long as you let yourself wallow in misery over this girl, nothing will change.

And hey, if you can't afford a new Camaro, what about a used one. You could probably easily afford a low mileage 1999-2002 SS or Trans Am. Those are awfully nice-looking cars, and a hell of a lot more fun to drive than some damn Civic.

Anyway, keep your chin up and just focus on the future. I guarantee you. Someday you will thank God that this woman dumped you, because otherwise you might not have met the person you're supposed to be with.

songsj · 07-14-2009, 02:36 AM

What did i say? Don't communicate with her and DON"T TAKE HER BACK!!!
She probably is a fruitcake!!!! Pick up your marbles and move on. She is not worth it.
Women always say about men " Once a cheater, always a cheater"
I say the same goes for women. The other half of that saying is " if they'll do it with you, They'll do it to you". Keep that in mind.

SummoneR · 07-14-2009, 03:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by songsj

What did i say? Don't communicate with her and DON"T TAKE HER BACK!!!
She probably is a fruitcake!!!! Pick up your marbles and move on. She is not worth it.
Women always say about men " Once a cheater, always a cheater"
I say the same goes for women. The other half of that saying is " if they'll do it with you, They'll do it to you". Keep that in mind.

I stayed with a woman for 7 years trying to make it work only to finally understand this is true.:(
I try to make myself feel better by thinking she came back for a reason... only to realize it's because I allowed her too...

Same goes for men too...

mkaresh · 07-14-2009, 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FriedCherry

Tell the girl that you saved her life by paying for her treatment and she needs to pay up. If she doesn't, i saw an episode of Judge Judy that was almost exactly this situation and the guy was awarded the money because of the cheating.

Sounds like he has too much class to go this route.

AZCamaroFan · 07-14-2009, 11:39 AM

As much as you may not want to, do as many things as possible to take your mind off her. If you have friends , spend time with them. If you don't , find some. Good friends, classy friends. Concentrate on your life. What happend isn't about you, it's her. There's a lot of beauty in the world, just keeping moving and not looking back.

PieNsky · 07-14-2009, 11:48 AM

Oh man, I hate to admit it but I was once in your shoes. Let me say this, you will be kicking yourself for feeling the way you do right now but it is normal. Yeah, it sucks. I lost weight 'cause I couldn't eat or sleep when it happened to me.
NOW REMEMBER THIS, you are better than trying to "save her", you can't do it anyway. You only want her back because you want the hurting to stop. And you may not understand this right now but yeah, you can do better than her although you don't believe it. Bad milk never gets better so stop going back to the fridge thinking it will. Don't put yourself through this. But right now you are not thinking straight anyway. And I can not believe I'm making a post in the Love Lorn thread. Hell dude, we all have been in your shoes! LISTEN TO US!!!!! STOP THE MADNESS AND STOP THE COMMUNICATION. IT WILL NOT STOP THE HURT. Time heals all things. All you have to do is make it through the next two months or one hot girl later...

PieNsky · 07-14-2009, 11:53 AM

And when I look at the girl who did it to me Facebook account all I can think is how I dodged a bullet. And yes, I do feel sorry for her still but feel more happy for me.

Jcc08 · 07-14-2009, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PieNsky

Bad milk never gets better so stop going back to the fridge thinking it will.

Damn. Words of wisdom!

SummoneR · 07-15-2009, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jcc08

Damn. Words of wisdom!

DropTheGloves · 07-15-2009, 06:37 AM

Ok, first off, you don't tell someone or have the right to tell someone they need to see a counselor just because they are with a older person, regardless if they are divorced. Thats like telling me I need to see a counslor because the woman I am with is 25 and I am 20, and she turns 26 before I turn 21. Dude, just leave her alone. Theres no other way to tell you but, ITS OVER, IT HAS BEEN OVER FOR A WHILE NOW, THERE IS NO CHANCE YOU WILL END UP WITH HER, GROW UP, STOP C0NTACTING HER, SHE DOESN'T LOVE YOU, ITS ALL BEEN A LIE, MOVE ON, STOP CRYING. Just accept the truth dude. Go sleep with her friends or something who cares. You are just making it worse on yourself.

bigralph · 07-15-2009, 10:58 AM

That sucks man!!!!!! You did a good thing and don't do anything about it just live your life. I know that one day you will be rewarded with a hot girl that will love you for who you are. Maybe you will fine her in school you will never know. ; )

I believe everything in life happen for a reason and don't worry her time will come. Do you know when her time will come. When the wife of the guy fines out that he is cheating on her and like always the guy will try to save the marriage by dumping your ex-girl to the curve. Also her mother will come to her when she is all heart broken and tell her "that's what you get from cheating on a good man." Her mother will tell her what you did to save her life. That will make her feel even worse.

I know it suck now but live your life go partying with your friends and keep save for your new camaro. You will be rewarded soon enough. One more thing don't ever, ever, ever take her back if you do I'm going to kick your ass if you do.

ud_lose · 07-15-2009, 12:21 PM

Ex's are Ex's for a reason. You didn't love her, you loved what you thought she was. True colors will always come out if you give it time.

sharbaugh · 07-15-2009, 12:41 PM

To many Girls, To many cars.
Everything happens for a reason.
Chin up, move on, there are crazy fun things in life.
Do you really thing in your early 20's you would meet one woman and never have sex with another woman your whole life. Don't be silly.

Jcc08 · 07-15-2009, 02:37 PM

He's right. Someday that girl's going to be 38, single, and the end result of a series of bad relationships that didn't work out because she dated a bunch of loser guys. She's going to be bitter, angry, and full of regret because the one guy who really loved her and would have made a good husband she kicked to the curb.

And you'll be older, wiser, and married to some hottie with 2-3 kids and you'll laugh at the memory of how you could be so broken up about her.

07-15-2009, 12:21 PM	#96
ud_lose #34873 Drives: '04 Ford F250 6.0L/'69 vette LS6 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Thornton, Co. Posts: 740 View My Garage	Ex's are Ex's for a reason. You didn't love her, you loved what you thought she was. True colors will always come out if you give it time. __________________

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07-13-2009, 08:40 PM	#85
Jcc08 Drives: 2008 Ford Mustang GT Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Ontario, CA Posts: 8	You didn't say both of you had the same counselor???!! Isn't that a huge conflict of interest?? The first thing you need to do is stop seeing that counselor. In fact, it might be a good idea to stop the counseling immediately. All it's doing is forcing you to relive everything over and over again, to someone (probably some uber-feminist wench) who clearly isn't on your side and certainly doesn't have your best interests in mind. I know what you're feeling. I'm not going to tell you your feelings for the girl weren't real. You were clearly in love with her...otherwise you wouldn't have sacrificed the Camaro fund to save her life. I don't want to be one of those people that tell you "it's just hormones" because in this case it's clearly not. That's why it hurts so much when she rejects you. When I was 19, I met my dream girl. She was Argentine-Italian, from New York, and she was gorgeous. She was the first girl that ever really took an interest in me, and I fell hard. We met at an Army ROTC summer camp in Kentucky and so it was the friendship that developed first, before the chemistry. That made the bond we had a hell of a lot stronger. A few months later, I flew to New York and we spent a very...shall we say, intense...week in her dorm. However, long story short, she lived in New York, I lived in California. We tried to write each other and email, but then she headed off to Germany on a foreign exchange trip, fell in love with some rich German dude, got pregnant (then married), and today she's got 3 kids and still living in Europe. I was heartbroken. Even today, ten years later, I still wonder what might have been. But then I think of my beautiful wife, whom I met in 2006. She's everything I ever wanted in a girl, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, and we're celebrating our first wedding anniversary this week. If she and the Argentine girl were standing side-by-side, and I could choose one over the other, I would choose my wife in a hearbeat! I guess the point I'm trying to make is that as painful as things are, and as awful as you feel right now, and as much as you loved her, she was not the right woman for you. She didn't deserve you, and I think you might have realized that over time. There is nothing you could have done. If she didn't cheat on you now, she would have cheated on you later, maybe at a time when you had a hell of a lot more to lose in a divorce (assets, children, etc.) than a Camaro fund. Trust me, you're going to find the woman of your dreams, and she is going to blow this one out of the water. You just have to be patient. This one is not coming back...and even if she did, would you really trust her again? Could you ever kiss her again and not think of that bald schmuck? Wouldn't you find that your love for her was a little less because of all this? You need to focus on the most important person right now, YOU. Go work out, focus on your studies, touch base with the friends you had when you were single, and start living your life again. As long as you let yourself wallow in misery over this girl, nothing will change. And hey, if you can't afford a new Camaro, what about a used one. You could probably easily afford a low mileage 1999-2002 SS or Trans Am. Those are awfully nice-looking cars, and a hell of a lot more fun to drive than some damn Civic. Anyway, keep your chin up and just focus on the future. I guarantee you. Someday you will thank God that this woman dumped you, because otherwise you might not have met the person you're supposed to be with.

07-14-2009, 02:36 AM	#86
songsj Drives: 2015 2SS/RS Summit White Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: MPLS Posts: 798	What did i say? Don't communicate with her and DON"T TAKE HER BACK!!! She probably is a fruitcake!!!! Pick up your marbles and move on. She is not worth it. Women always say about men " Once a cheater, always a cheater" I say the same goes for women. The other half of that saying is " if they'll do it with you, They'll do it to you". Keep that in mind.

07-14-2009, 11:39 AM	#89
AZCamaroFan Camaro6 2016-2018 Drives: sometimes Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Phoenix Posts: 18,468	As much as you may not want to, do as many things as possible to take your mind off her. If you have friends , spend time with them. If you don't , find some. Good friends, classy friends. Concentrate on your life. What happend isn't about you, it's her. There's a lot of beauty in the world, just keeping moving and not looking back.

07-14-2009, 11:48 AM	#90
PieNsky Drives: Victory Red 1LS Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Louisville,KY Posts: 1,928 View My Garage	Oh man, I hate to admit it but I was once in your shoes. Let me say this, you will be kicking yourself for feeling the way you do right now but it is normal. Yeah, it sucks. I lost weight 'cause I couldn't eat or sleep when it happened to me. NOW REMEMBER THIS, you are better than trying to "save her", you can't do it anyway. You only want her back because you want the hurting to stop. And you may not understand this right now but yeah, you can do better than her although you don't believe it. Bad milk never gets better so stop going back to the fridge thinking it will. Don't put yourself through this. But right now you are not thinking straight anyway. And I can not believe I'm making a post in the Love Lorn thread. Hell dude, we all have been in your shoes! LISTEN TO US!!!!! STOP THE MADNESS AND STOP THE COMMUNICATION. IT WILL NOT STOP THE HURT. Time heals all things. All you have to do is make it through the next two months or one hot girl later...

07-14-2009, 11:53 AM	#91
PieNsky Drives: Victory Red 1LS Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Louisville,KY Posts: 1,928 View My Garage	And when I look at the girl who did it to me Facebook account all I can think is how I dodged a bullet. And yes, I do feel sorry for her still but feel more happy for me.

07-15-2009, 06:37 AM	#94
DropTheGloves Account Suspended Drives: 2009 TT 335/2009 GSX-R 1000/ECT.. Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Tampa, Florida Posts: 772	Ok, first off, you don't tell someone or have the right to tell someone they need to see a counselor just because they are with a older person, regardless if they are divorced. Thats like telling me I need to see a counslor because the woman I am with is 25 and I am 20, and she turns 26 before I turn 21. Dude, just leave her alone. Theres no other way to tell you but, ITS OVER, IT HAS BEEN OVER FOR A WHILE NOW, THERE IS NO CHANCE YOU WILL END UP WITH HER, GROW UP, STOP C0NTACTING HER, SHE DOESN'T LOVE YOU, ITS ALL BEEN A LIE, MOVE ON, STOP CRYING. Just accept the truth dude. Go sleep with her friends or something who cares. You are just making it worse on yourself.

07-15-2009, 10:58 AM	#95
bigralph Drives: 2001 v6 Camaro Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Northborough, MA Posts: 267	That sucks man!!!!!! You did a good thing and don't do anything about it just live your life. I know that one day you will be rewarded with a hot girl that will love you for who you are. Maybe you will fine her in school you will never know. ; ) I believe everything in life happen for a reason and don't worry her time will come. Do you know when her time will come. When the wife of the guy fines out that he is cheating on her and like always the guy will try to save the marriage by dumping your ex-girl to the curve. Also her mother will come to her when she is all heart broken and tell her "that's what you get from cheating on a good man." Her mother will tell her what you did to save her life. That will make her feel even worse. I know it suck now but live your life go partying with your friends and keep save for your new camaro. You will be rewarded soon enough. One more thing don't ever, ever, ever take her back if you do I'm going to kick your ass if you do.

07-15-2009, 12:41 PM	#97
sharbaugh Tampa Gulf Coast Family Drives: IMB RS SS MANUAL LOADED Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Ellenton, FL Posts: 262	To many Girls, To many cars. Everything happens for a reason. Chin up, move on, there are crazy fun things in life. Do you really thing in your early 20's you would meet one woman and never have sex with another woman your whole life. Don't be silly.

07-15-2009, 02:37 PM	#98
Jcc08 Drives: 2008 Ford Mustang GT Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Ontario, CA Posts: 8	He's right. Someday that girl's going to be 38, single, and the end result of a series of bad relationships that didn't work out because she dated a bunch of loser guys. She's going to be bitter, angry, and full of regret because the one guy who really loved her and would have made a good husband she kicked to the curb. And you'll be older, wiser, and married to some hottie with 2-3 kids and you'll laugh at the memory of how you could be so broken up about her.