Life happens... Moving on!

[CamaroCracka]

If you are still pretty young, have you thought about the military? That is how I got my degree, eventually. Of course, I partied way too much in there, but when things really went south, I was able to use my GI bill and start turning things around. I ended up 35 with nothing; no money, no job, nothing. I do alright now with a realistic healthy retirement window of 5-8 years and I'm currently 59.

[0stones0]

Originally Posted by morepowerjoe

I'm sorry but I have to say a few things. If you spent as much time working as you do on this darn forum you would probably be ok. And what do you mean you didn't check your emails? You didn't know you had a car payment? Come on. Most guys your age are still living with their parents and for good reason. Interest rates are way too high to be buying anything with a loan right now especially with sup par credit. You should swallow your pride and move back with your parents if they'll have you until you get back on your feet because rent is too high right now as well. It would be in your best interest to pay off those student loans before you move out too. You should be really grateful they even let you borrow a car. Your parents were probably right; you really couldn't afford to move out. Did you have any savings? Emergency fund? You should have at least 6 months' salary saved up and a paid off car before you even think of moving out on your own. As far as your degree goes, it doesn't really matter what your degree is in because what it shows potential employers is that your dedicated and dependable. That you can get up every day and do something. I made quite a few mistakes as well when I was younger, but I learned from them and I hope you did/do too. Sorry to be so blunt but the worlds not a nice place and the sooner you learn that the sooner you will get ahead.

A big +1 on this! ^^^^

[TheBrightSide]

Originally Posted by morepowerjoe

I'm sorry but I have to say a few things. If you spent as much time working as you do on this darn forum you would probably be ok. And what do you mean you didn't check your emails? You didn't know you had a car payment? Come on. Most guys your age are still living with their parents and for good reason. Interest rates are way too high to be buying anything with a loan right now especially with sup par credit. You should swallow your pride and move back with your parents if they'll have you until you get back on your feet because rent is too high right now as well. It would be in your best interest to pay off those student loans before you move out too. You should be really grateful they even let you borrow a car. Your parents were probably right; you really couldn't afford to move out. Did you have any savings? Emergency fund? You should have at least 6 months' salary saved up and a paid off car before you even think of moving out on your own. As far as your degree goes, it doesn't really matter what your degree is in because what it shows potential employers is that your dedicated and dependable. That you can get up every day and do something. I made quite a few mistakes as well when I was younger, but I learned from them and I hope you did/do too. Sorry to be so blunt but the worlds not a nice place and the sooner you learn that the sooner you will get ahead.

Nah, I meant the student loan payment demands. I didn't really keep good track of it up until the point I graduated. They started sending once in a blue moon phone calls, and some e-mails; which I have so much spam, but I was kind of ignorant about it like I was saying.

And yes, I was warned like 2-3 years prior to even deciding to buy the car on my very own, that I would be pretty much putting most of what I was making from work, into the car. I barely was able to save $100-300 at a time, and most of the time, my mental health was crap, so I was still impulsively spending. I had gotten over a "spending" addiction like 2-3 years prior and figured it wouldn't be as bad, but obviously after paying more than a 1/3 of my paycheck monthly, it became agonizing.

And to be honest, I don't know how long I'll last at my parents' since we don't have a good relationship and I'm a 1st gen Asian American. My parents immigrated here after like 1989, and they met sometime after that and the rest is history. However, their marriage isn't the most peaceful and my upbringing was fairly rough, aside from financial safety (which only meant so much to me at specific, crucial times).

Technically, I had the choice to get a backbone (Idk how else to describe it) around pre-COVID during 2019, to move out and didn't. And then I also could've chosen my own car, instead of trying to compromise with my parents and tried to buy something that was in the middle of what they "approved" and what I liked. Compromising like that was terrible, as is most things I do; but my mental and physical health kinda dwindles while I'm here at my parents' home...

I've done a good part of trying to mend the relationship with my parents, but they have their own cultural bias and generational trauma, so stuff like family counseling is severely foreign to them (and believe me, I've tried). Even through things my mom helps with out with right now, such as letting me borrow a beater vehicle, she has ulterior motives. Because of such, I honestly really hate depending on them when it comes down to it, and is more or less my last resort.

I'm kind of working on some things here until the New Year arrives, and then I'm looking for a place to share space with, under the table, or sublet somewhere. Yes, there's risks to doing so, but I've moved on from the whole debacle with the car and all, and started managing my finances slowly in the time that I've had off from work.

[TheBrightSide]

Originally Posted by Moto-Mojo

Why do I get the feeling 'TheBrightSide' is AI? I find some of the odd phrasing and "loquaciousness" very AI-ish.

I rant a lot. It's kinda one of the things I tend to do when I type. It's like a detachment from me having to physically speak, where it requires way more brain power, etc. (at least in my opinion).

I try to at least section and phrase things to have them make sense, like if you were reading and everything was explained in order, as to not throw you off, like an endless fever dream.

My style of communication normally, even outside, is to not really say much unless I find that it's of value or some importance to whatever's being discussed. That's not to say I don't small talk or chit-chat, maybe just out of being lightly sociable. I find myself pretty neurodivergent to an extent, but I sometimes rant, hoping that it's at least info someone else can learn from or make use of.

[Moto-Mojo]

Fair enough. But I have to say, you have a better command of the English language than any 27 year old I ever knew. With one possible exception. But I hung out with grease monkeys when I was 27!

Maybe you should parlay your writing skills and love for performance cars into something like freelance writing for some online automotive sites or good, old fashioned magazines like, Car and Driver? I can tell you this about the workforce out there now, (but you probably knew) you can't get people to answer a want ad. And IF they do, their written - and especially verbal, skills are 6th grade level. I know you said you'd rather write but if you can converse half as well as you write, you should practically be able to 'write' your own job ticket. Good luck out there.